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Saturday, 2 January 2016


2015 already past, and 2016 is here! Congratulations for all of us who has survived the past 2015 :) We all have to be proud of our selves for having such a great year! Even if 2015 was not that great for some people, we can make 2016 better by starting right now.

This post are just for reminders for my goals list in 2016 hahaha not particularly general post but kind of private but anyway my diary is this blog so here I come!

My goals in 2016 :
1. get slimmer
2. more exercise
3. read read read
4. friendlier to other people
5. be much more confident than before
6. be ignorant (I care too much so my goal is to be more ignorant, maybe I will become more attractive :p)
7. smile smile smile
8. think before speak
9. good grades (not the top list but v important)
10. be a good girl that God wants :)

as you know from the previous previous posts I really adore Lang Lang ( Chinese pianist) because he was the one that inspired me to do classical music in my WHOLE LIFE maybe 12 or 13 years since I started learn piano idk but because of him!!! So much gratefulness.

IhopewhenIhavethischancetoseehimliveplayingthepianoIcantakeapicturewithhimwhoasoexcited!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I currently still in Hangzhou now, past December went to Shanghai which was a great adventure hahaha but really miss my family jk no srsly really. People here are very nice, whether they are fellow foreigners or Chinese people , and there are always friends from Indonesia who are so nice really really nice like my roommate my uni friends or Indonesian friends I met here. 

I have a Indonesian friend who is 3 years older than me (ci Fionada) and she volunteer to teach me some mandarin because you know my mandarin is that bad and when I am an exchange student in China I don't have the Chinese class so confusing BUT anyway she decided to help me learn some mandarin :''''''''''''''') thank God for always giving me good people around. Many prosperity and blessings come for you ci!

And other friends who are older or younger are so sweet! I am that kind of person who really like to be alone but if I am alone too long I will feel everybody doesn't care about me. yes that is 10000% true. But here there are many of my friends who persuade me or invite me to have dinner together, study together, etc . And that kind of small situation makes me really here. "I am here , live in a real world"  :)

Lesson of the day : small things can make other people feel different for you

Just try it! and everybody will be in the peaceful state on their own world :)

Cheers from the second day of the new year!

2nd January 2016


Saturday, 14 November 2015


Hey! SO... it is really a long time to not post something in your own private website for a full whole year, right? :)

For one year has past, NOW I am studying at China as an exchange student. HA! COOL RIGHT! OF COURSE NO! :"""""""""""" *crycrycrycrycrycry*
I know that so many people really want to have exchange program at their university, including me. And luckily, at my university there is such program and I can join that program. Bless me. My destination since beginning was China because I thought at that time :
"I should learn to China!" 
"China is a really good country for learning computer science"
"I want to speak Chinese"
"China is a stepping stone for me to get good review for applying jobs everywhere"

And truthfully, all of them are true. Really. But I missed so many points before I go to China :
- I am not good enough at programming .  And I mean coding some program. Literally. I don't know what have I been studying until nnnnnnnow -_-
- I cannot speak Mandarin while all people here speak Mandarin. Even the "bule"s (if you are Indonesian, you will know what is bule) can speak Mandarin fluently. VERY ASHAMED. I have failed as an Asian that have Chinese blood in her body.
- I am not used to the culture -> very few people say "sorry" , "thanks", "pardon" , or even smile at random people. At first I thought "Chinese people are so rude!!" But finally I understand........ Those ALL are their culture. HA. No problem. I am fine. Thank you. Arigatou. Terima kasih. I already used to it for staying here for 2 months :)

My pro tips for all of you who wants to exchange to China (randomly, like me ofc, haha) :
-learn some Mandarin ! Even it is only for daily conversation, it's OK! At least you can speak with the waiter when you want to buy some food... Or read the menu (that is really important you know, if you are like me, you will be really frustated to "Pleco" every Mandarin words on your phone and translate them one by one. (Pleco : Chinese dictionary application , you can download it in your own phone's application stores )
- Study hard before you study here! You know the rumors that Asian especially Chinese people are extremely smart? no kidding. That is true. #INFORMATIONSEALED #APPROVED #PRIVATECHATIFYOUDONOTBELIEVEME  !!!
- Learn to adapt with your surroundings quickly. Not only you will get benefit here for being "ignorant", but you can also adapt quickly to other cultures wherever you are :)

That's all for this one-year-gap session of writing while crying deeply in my heart.............. I wish I know them sooner. 

I will write my updates in China ASAP



Tuesday, 2 December 2014


"Rich Mate Please!"

"I have already tired of this bullsh*t load of exams assignments and crazy lecturers I just want to marry someone with a lot of money" , said Deena, 19 year old girl with silky beautiful hair, round cute Asian face, and about 165 cm tall. Of course Deena can meet someone who is also attractive and has a lot of money, and Deena can continue her beauty care until she is 70. Deena is a really nice and smart girl. Her GPA is above 3.5 which is really awesome.

I believe Deena can have super-extraordinary rich and handsome husband one day, but is it really necessary to talk about your husband must be that rich? Really? What is the bound between rich husband and lots of exams or assignments lecturers give to her? This is some kind of trends these days especially for women and girls, jokes where people say "I am tired of school, I just want to marry rich guys and be a socialite housewife" . I know school is tiring, and so many people especially women who are rich because of their husband's money. If you read this stuff, maybe you will agree with their ideas about it. I also agree that rich husbands are one of the best investment for girls who want to have instant wealth.

For a random day I think about that kind of situation and I think "that's a good idea!" But suddenly I think more about it. "How about my parents who already spend so much money for me to have proper education? From elementary to senior high school and to go to university?" "How can I get that kind of man?" "What if that rich husband die suddenly and I got nothing?" "howoasdjfalisefoaiepaweidldklsihaewpi" and my mind exploded -> sleep.

It's good to have alternate way to achieve some of your dreams, but we also have to think, how we can get that kind of spouse (rich man or rich woman) if WE JUST THIS ORDINARY AND DO NOTHING. Do you think just pray for God and do nothing , you will get so much luck and you will live like a Cinderella? No. Cinderella does not exist. Even Princess Kate have so much effort to get Prince William's attention. Oh , even Cinderella gave her effort to work hard , pray, and leaving her stupendous glass slipper. To keep you on your mind, you also have to be a great person with so much effort and hard also smart work for everything you want to do, so that attractive , young and rich mate can get into you. This is not just for girls but also guys in this world because there are so much "jokes" like this happening in this year 2014 and it is going to end soon! You can continue or not ending this dream but you also have to develop yourself more so you can be the same as great as them so you all can be great richie rich couple. Your spouse's mother and father will also proud to have you as their children's spouse, not only see you as a parasite to their child.

I know this is kind of sarcasm post and many people will be insulted or MAYBE THERE IS A READER I don't think there will be readers for this post but I just want to express my mind over this situation. I have heard enough about people babbling about it, about 1000 times more I have heard from different teenagers' mouths. Ciao!

Sunday, 19 October 2014


Hello guys! So as you know I am a member of PHANDOM (Phil and Dan Fandom :D) and this is Phil Lester's newest video. YOU HAVE TO WATCH THIS BECAUSE THIS IS SO CREATIVE I WANT TO HUG THE MONITOR!
After inventing 7 Second Challenge, Tumblr Tag, and this Brain Tour I realize Phil is really one of a kind youtuber . He is a very creative guy but not so many people or teenager see his talent because of his gesture(?) make them think that Phil is an (adorably) awkward person.Hope for the best for Phil . Hope universe will acknowledge his creativity which is beyond other youtubers' imagination. PHANDOM LOVES PHIL LESTER!


Rejection (Featuring Intermezzo In A minor Op. 118 #2)

The song is too beautiful I can't breath ohmygod.....................
This song is kind of sad because ***********************************************
I got rejection for 2 times. First, I failed on the interview test for iBuddy (exchange students' mentor) and second is the rejection from interview to the Learning Society in my university.
To be honest, I felt a bit disappointed because every time people interviewed me , I felt I had given my best to answer clearly and honestly. Today I am thinking "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? So many people who seems not really care about organization in university can get the chance to be in the organization or the club ( but most of them are very hard worker people, trust me, I hate lies) but I can not get that chance. Is it because I am too stupid for that organization? Or my body gesture is wrong? Or am I too ugly? Am I too self-centered? Am I not having capability to do some of the tasks from that organization? I mean, they just did the interview and BAM! The opportunity to get in the club / or organization that I REALLY WANT TO TRY , suddenly disappeared.
 I know exactly that I am way too sensitive person. In these 2 cases that many people think "OH DEAR IT IS NOTHING COMPARE TO MY SITUATION NOW IT IS SO MUCH WORSE" but yes I think this is kind of condition that make me slumped because I AM a self-confident person who NEVER GET A THING OF REJECTION. When I got these 2 rejection in the same year, and close months, I am confused. Is this something God give me because I am too snob? Because I am overly self-attached?
.... I think Yes, but I also think it's No. God always give me every time I treasure, even if it is in bad situations (read my previous story "Grateful") or other many good situations I have ever experienced. Yes, because He wants me to always look at Him, not only myself. Not "I can do it all by myself" , but "I have to do the best but let God do the rest" *RELIGIOUS MODE ON* Ha ha ha........... I know the readers will not laugh (and who will read this post anyway? It's about rejection, dude, pls -_----) ..... But I also think that it is not God who give this rejection. It is because of myself who not give much effort to do the interview and just "Yes I have loud voice great self-confident anything I answered will captivate them" Oh God it is just....... NO. This kind of thinking is way too snob. Lol I feel kind of stupid to share the thoughts here.
But yeah I think that's all for my cry fry dry sly situation today, I hope in every next days, they will be MINE , keep the faith! :)


Saturday, 6 September 2014

My Dear Music Family

My Great Maestros (piano,vocal)

It has been several months since I graduated from my dear music school, YPM (Yayasan Pendidikan Musik) , Manggarai, South Jakarta, Indonesia. I studied classical piano. And this is my lovely classmates that always together for 3 years. Since the graduation, I haven't meet up in person with them. Really miss those memories when we scared, sad, happy, excited because of music we played. So many ups and downs we have been through, eventho we are not THAT close as really best of the best friends, but we support each others . I felt that we were really unified when we talked about music. Music made us one. 

Because I don't have music course anymore, I just play any songs I desired, like Disney songs (mostly). I miss classic piano song. Well I don't really good at it but still because of classical music I have known so many about music. Especially because in my music school there are history about music (every era(s)) , counterpoint, psychology, pedagogy, theory, solfeggio and all I wrote was knowledge about music. I enjoyed most of them, although there are subjects I don't really like up till now. Thanks to my friends too , because I often asked them too much about every subjects I didn't really understand at the time we still studied together in YPM. Seriously I was no clue and lazy back then. Thanks guys.

Lack of practicing scales is my condition now. My hands even feel numb when I try to play scale slowly. I realize I really have to get back the practice routine.... Sigh. 

The most important about missing the classical music is the people . I miss to chit chat with people around about classical music. I miss to had skype with them in bad, sad, or happy conditions regarding classical music. I miss hanging out together even only in arcade. Miss all of these things. And to think now my life is just for study in university and talking about Pop songs all day (western, korean, japanese, indonesian, or whatever they come from) made me bored.

Current desire : classical music (orchestra, piano, violin, quartet, choir, etc.) -> wanting to see the performance and hear the music  LIVE so I can have "EARGASM" which I haven't got it for really long time.

P.S. : I'm sorry for many typos or grammatical error for those out there being #grammarnazi .